I want to be a woman, who is disciplined in exercise and diet, who knows how to cook (really cook), who gets up at the same time every day for time alone with God and who goes to bed at an hour that will allow my morning goal to be a reality, who gardens and sews and decorates like the magazines, who dresses well, who has all the paperwork in the house perfectly filed and understands all of the paperwork that comes through the mail (i.e. health benefits), who spends a well-balanced time on the computer, in front of the tv, on the phone, on the iPad without neglecting my time to be with God, His Word and in prayer every day.
I want to be a wife who loves and respects my husband well, who writes encouraging notes, who makes him yummy lunches, who makes home-made delicious dinners every night, who prays diligently for him throughout the day, and who honors him with my time, my ear, my heart when he is home.
I want to be a wife and mom who goes above and beyond for my family, who is always finding ways to treat them to fun days out, who is able to make just the right dinner to please everyone (while still being healthy), who is able to encourage and build up my husband and kids in just the way that they need.
I want to be a friend who remembers birthdays and gives just the right gift, who knows when to talk and when to listen, and who serves others more than seeks to be served.
Ugh... Really? Is this beneficial to dwell on? All of these things are who I think I want to be, but, what I really want is to do all of these things so that my family, friends and God will love me and boast about me. I need to stop and remember TRUTH. The truth about who I am. Last spring I read the book, "Victory Over the Darkness." What a blessing to be reminded in those pages of my identity in Christ.
Being a Christian is not just a matter of getting something; it's a matter of being someone. A Christian is not simply a person who gets forgiveness, who gets to go to heaven, who gets the Holy Spirit, who gets a new nature. A Christian, in terms of our deepest identity, is a saint, a spiritually born child of God, a divine masterpiece, a child of light, a citizen of heaven. Being born again transformed you into someone who didn't exist before. What you receive as a Christian isn't the point; its who you are. It's not what you do as a Christian that determines who you are; it's who you are that determines what you do.
{2 Corinthians 5:17; Ephesians 2:10; 1 Peter 2:9,10; 1 John 3:1.2}
When all of my wanting to "DO" becomes my identity, I become discouraged and defeated. I forget that it is not what I do that matters to God. God sees me as I am in Christ. I belong to Him. He sees me and He loves me. All the things I want to be (and do) are good and decent things to desire and seek after, but when they begin to mar my identity in Christ they are not beneficial for me to dwell on.
In Christ I am a saint, saved by grace, with the Holy Spirit dwelling in me. When I believe this - who I am and who I want to be, match up. I want to be loved. In Christ, it's not for what I do and how well I do it, but I am loved because Christ is in me. Getting up early to spend time with Him is not a chore, but an opportunity for worship and showing gratitude for His mercy and goodness towards me.
Whew! So, it's okay for me to sit with a cup of coffee and unwind during the day without fretting about all the missed opportunities to be perfectly loving and perfectly perfect? Yes!
In Christ, I am united to the Lord and am one spirit with Him.
1 Corinthians 6:17
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